4 weeks old

Lila would have been 4 weeks old today. Since there is no 31st day in February I think she would have also been a month old. She should be here with us on this snowy day wearing her one month old onesie that I got from one of my baby showers. Today has been particularly hard. I got a phone call from a Pittsburgh area code that I answered, even though I have not been answering the phone lately. It was someone who said they were calling from a speech and audiology department to set up an appointment for Lila. I did not know what to say. I said that she passed away and the lady apologized and quickly hung up. But for a brief moment, I thought Lila was still here. I thought I could have said that I can bring her in anytime, I mean I am not working, my life is devoted to taking care of my baby. Taking her to appointments and spending the day with her is what we do together now while Mike is at work. It is all I ever wanted to do. -Jenny